Monday, May 22, 2006

The Forced to Eat'em Blues

(Inspired by FOLSOM PRISON BLUES by JOHNNY CASH and The Alien)

I hear that toilet flushin'
It's rollin' 'round the bowl,
I won't be seein' my bible,
Since, they flushed it down that hole,
I'm stuck in Gitmo Prison,
And they keep feedin' me
though I told em I don't want to,
through a tube - forcibly.

When I was back home workin',
My neighbor told Uncle Sam,
"That there boy's a 'rebel'",
But a farmer's all I am
But they put me on a transport,
with a bag on my head,
When I heard I was in Gitmo,
I knew I was as good as dead.

I bet there's other poor men
That got it worse than me,
They've probably been "renditioned"
to some black hole overseas,
I never had this comin',
Why cain't I be free?,
But these people keep a-sayin',
I'm the enemy.

Well, if they freed me from this prison,
I wonder what I'd find,
I bet my family's all been taken,
and my fields have all been mined,
Far from being grateful,
For "liberating" me,
If its a "rebel" that they want, well,
Thats' alright with me.

K @ K's this R?
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Friday, May 19, 2006

Too Bright and Way Too, Too Much Fidelity...

Well it was one of those nights that starts slow and intimate then balloons into loud and Office Party-ish. BikerBouncer had a cake that none of us had the courage to refer to for fear he might offer us a piece - Happy B-Day Biker "Larry" Bouncer.

Other big news... KG the KJ ("Karaoke Jock" as The Alien describes it) was back and at the helm... no Matchbox Kenny... so the Ship was muchly tightened. Unfortunately KG has little or no feeling in one of his Hands - so back under the knife he goes. At least he is out of the "halo" kneck brace. I am wondering now if maybe his medication is a bit off... because, as "performers", we had some serious issues with the sound "mix".

As only a "performer" might appreciate, you want to hear yourself only enough to know vaguely how bad you are embarrassing yourself... but not _precisely_ how much you are embarrassing yourself...

You ALSO want to be able to hear the music and background singers so you have a vague notion of where you aren't in the song and what key you aren't in.

Unfortunately everything was reversed. I swear I could hear my own heartbeat coming back to me from the "mic monitor". Breathing anywhere near the "mic" created a painful blast of sound coming from the ceiling-mounted speaker just to your left - you can imagine what "singing" sounded like... too loud... too bright and way too too much fidelity...

ALSO I could hear it, but the "audience" could not... based on the "positioning" of the "speaker"

ALSO, I could bearly hear any of the music - but the "audience" could...

This created a interesting effect when "heard" from the "audience"... An incredibly quiet, tentative "performer" that had absolutely no idea where they were. I could see it in even the most seasoned, brash performers... That PROUD MARY girl was there and she is annoyingly fearless and she was as tentative as first timer. Even MAGOO-SAN was temporarily confused - only temporarily because his style requires no adherence to the actual "number" in the first place so his confusion was more having to do with being forced to listen to himself for a change.

Well enough complaining... a good time was had - Jimmy booed MAGOO-SAN with a harsh, cruel vengeance (even for Jimmy)... heartwarming times. JOANNE melted the assembled crowd's hearts with I TIP MY HAT TO YOU, etc.

THE LINE UP
The Alien: PAINT IT BLACK (Ignoring the "mix" challenges and putting in a office party cheering performance)
Lisap: PAPERBACK WRITER (transcending the sound problems... She does it better live than the Beatles did)
Chris: ALISON (my aim is definitely NOT true)

Hope to see you all for K @ K's next R!
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Monday, May 15, 2006

I had a Dream I had an Awesome Dream

(inspired by SAY YOU, SAY ME, by LIONEL RICHIE)

K two, K three; K it for hours
That’s the way it should be
K two, K three; K it together
Duet-tily

I had a dream I had an awesome dream
People in the bar "cheering" me on the "stage"
But that they "cheered" me was a my mistake
I was just drunk and confused, why am I still doing this at my age?

K two, K three; K it for hours
That’s the way it should be
K two, K three; K it together
Duet-tily

K @ K's on R?
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Friday, May 12, 2006

The Bad Weather Keeps the Riff-Raff Out... and IN

Seemed like it had been a while, but it seemed like old times... There's Marie... There's Droopy... There's Jimmy's Wife... Jimmlet... Jimmy, the Rock, the Patriarch of course... BikerBouncer (bouncing back nicely from his Groin Pull). Speaking of BikerBouncer, his Birthday is next R @ K's for K, so mark your calendar - He asked me in a very concerned tone whether we were "going to take care of him" - so unless you want to see BikerBouncer uncared for you better show! Next R @ K's for K might be the last time you see him for a bit owing to his upcoming, deserved Vacation. The Alien might have more to add... I noticed he was huddled with him for quite a while down at the end of the bar at the Bouncers' Station.

Big party (somebody brought their Mother?! Who does that!?) - so with Matchbox Kenny at the COM that meant the Big Jam. However once we got into the rotation, we all got to go serially... like we prefer it.

One of the first people up there was a Toby Keith-alike complete with muscle shirt and painstakingly bent and customized "cowboy" hat. Come on... Brokeback Mountain has been on DVD for months now... we see right through that "tough" exterior, Girlfriend!

Other than that... as Rhonda put it, "The bad weather keeps the riff-raff out... and IN" K's... It was a good relaxed evening - no real run ins or close calls.

THE LINE UP

The Alien: CRACKLIN' ROSE (shameless and magnificent pandering)
Mr Brett: YOU GIVE LOVE A BAD NAME (BAD NAME) (Big Hit with the Big Party)
Rhonda: (chose to sit this one out)
Joe: (chose to sit this one out)
LisaP: IMAGINE (sometimes a single "performance" can change the course of history)
Chris: JUST LIKE A WOMAN (but I "perform" like a little girl)

Remember K @ K's on Next R is BikerBouncer's Birthday and we'll all get to take care of him!
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Tuesday, May 09, 2006

That there's Jimmy's wife

(Inspired by THE FARMER IN THE DELL)

It's time to go to Hell
It's time to go to Hell
This High Life has got to go
It's time to go to Hell

That there's Jimmy's wife
That there's Jimmy's wife
How she sees, I don't know
That there's Jimmy's wife

KG hurt his neck
KG hurt his neck
Stick in a cadaver bone
KG hurt his neck

K @ K's on R?
K @ K's on R?
Hi-ho, 'nother faux-mo
K @ K's on R?
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Tuesday, May 02, 2006

If you suck no need to fear

Enie Menie Miney Meer
Pick a song and chug that beer
If you suck no need to fear
Enie Menie Drink more Beer

Just a reminder, I will not be @ K's this R for K... I will be traveling
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